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Signs of Child Grooming

Signs of Child Grooming
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Signs of child grooming often begin with subtle changes that parents often confuse with typical teenage behaviors or hormonal changes. Children who have been groomed may show increased withdrawal, anxiety, depression, fear of certain people, sudden changes in grades, running away, unexplained self-harm, or inappropriate sexualized knowledge or actions for their age. Strangers don’t pose the highest risk to children. The vast majority (93%) of child sexual abuse victims know and trust the offender. In Texas, out of the 42,000 confirmed investigations of child abuse and neglect, over 68,000 of those young people were sexually abused. Also, 1 in 6 Texas high school students report having experienced sexual abuse, and 3 out of 5 victims never disclose child sexual abuse. Answering the question ‘what is sexual grooming‘ and recognizing the early warning signs of grooming a child is crucial to protecting children. People who suffered child sexual abuse are at a higher risk of having issues with mental health, addiction, and intimate abuse in adult relationships.

If you believe your child was sexually abused, legal options are available. Compensation may not reverse time, but it can help your child get the resources they need to make a physical and psychological recovery. Contact a Texas sexual abuse attorney for a free consultation by calling (713) 622-7271.

What Does Grooming a Child Mean?

Grooming is often a precursor to covert sexual abuse. This is a deliberate process in which abusers gain access to a potential victim. Victims are often vulnerable adults or people under the age of consent in Texas. Predators often push the personal boundaries of minors or those experiencing vulnerability by bringing up sexual topics or other forms to initiate a relationship in an attempt to fulfill the sexual desires of the offender. Many offenders use a range of tactics to manipulate minors or vulnerable people and gain trust before they begin any type of sexual exploitation. An offender who initiates the grooming process slowly has a lower likelihood of being caught before they sexually abuse their victims.

Child Grooming Texas Penal Code

Under the Texas Penal Code, child grooming is a standalone criminal offense. The sexual offences apply when a person has knowledge that the victim is a minor under 18 years old and persuades, induces, entices, coerces, or attempts to do so, to engage in conduct that the actor believes would lead to sexual contact. Even if it doesn’t lead to sexually abusing the minor, this form of sexual exploitation is generally a third-degree felony, but it may be elevated to a second-degree felony if the actor has certain prior convictions for sexual or trafficking offenses.

signs of grooming

Types of Grooming

Children can be groomed online or in person. This can take many different forms, so it’s important for parents and caregivers to be aware of the different types. The three most common types of grooming behaviors include psychological, physical, and community. 

What Is Psychological Grooming?

Parents and children can be victims of psychological grooming. Being groomed psychologically involves the perpetrator becoming a friend to the young person. They’ll coach, befriend on social networking sites, or date a parent to develop a friendship before they begin the process of sexual exploitation. If the young person starts pulling away from the relationship at any point, the abuser will guilt them by threatening family, friends, or even pets. This confusion helps ensure that victims are silenced through fear.

What Is Physical Grooming?

Perpetrators use desensitization tactics to ensure the young person gets used to physical touch. The touches start innocently enough and progress to tickling or wrestling. If children display any signs that they feel uncomfortable, the abuser knows more physical contact is necessary before they can sexually exploit them. Once victims stop showing signals that they feel uncomfortable, the predator will advance to sexual contact.

Community or Institutional Grooming

Many child predators are viewed as upstanding members of their community. Groomers are often seen as people who are extremely trustworthy. Many gain positions that allow easy access to the child or children they wish to groom. Without a report, groomers often pursue other adults who believe the young person is seeking attention or is otherwise troubled. Both child predators and the school can be held responsible for sexual exploitation, depending on the institutional responses after being reported.

Online Child Grooming

Online grooming occurs when an adult builds a relationship with a child online to exploit them. Typically, online child grooming involves social networking sites, video game platforms, or messaging apps to build a trusting relationship. Here, the offender’s goal is to isolate children from the support of their families. Tactics for online grooming often involve compliments, gift giving, or abusers will pretend to share a common interest. Once groomed, it often leads to child sexual abuse before parents learn about the relationship.

Parental Grooming

Sometimes the child’s family members can be groomed as well. Predators often gain access to children through their families. Many groomers begin the grooming process by offering to ‘help’ parents and caregivers. Offenders may offer to babysit, coach, give rides, or help with home repairs. They may also complement parenting styles or give gifts for entire families to avoid detection.

However, the most obvious form of parental grooming is starting a romantic relationship with a single parent to gain access to a child. Playing with children in non-sexual ways begins the desensitization process for physical touch. The physical contact later turns into sexual exploitation.

child grooming signs

Signs of Grooming Online

If grooming is happening online, caregivers should look for changes in behaviour that indicate something is wrong. This can include changes in behavior online or in person, such as being protective around devices, rapidly increasing time online (especially at odd hours), or minimizing screens when people approach. This indicates victims are hiding conversations or interactions that pose concerns. Unexplained new possessions, extra money, or sudden use of sexual language beyond what is typical for the child’s age may further suggest online sexual exploitation by someone they’re interacting with.

Talking openly with children about their online experiences and establishing trust is critical so kids feel comfortable disclosing troubling interactions.

Who Can Be A Groomer?

According to the most recent statistics:

  • Approximately 93.5% to 93.6% of individuals sentenced for child sexual abuse in the U.S. are male perpetrators.

  • In studies of sex offenders over 30, 87% were married. Another study found that among heterosexual men diagnosed with pedophilia, 66% were currently or previously married. For predators under 30, 87% were single.

  • Approximately 51% of all male perpetrators of child sexual abuse are the biological fathers of the victims. About 25% of adult female perpetrators occupy a “mother figure” role. Stepfathers, mothers’ boyfriends, and other relatives make up the remaining cases of known perpetrators.

  • In education-based abuse cases, 92% of offenders held professional positions of trust, such as teachers or coaches. 

Where Does Grooming Happen Most Commonly?

Unfortunately, grooming can happen to a young person almost anywhere. A sexual predator may try to get away with grooming children in person or online. Usually, the predator is someone within the victim’s circle of trust. This could be a family member, a teacher, or even a youth group leader. These existing relationships allow the groomer to have some kind of natural interaction with the victim.

Stages of Grooming

Grooming is about gaining access to a victim and maintaining control in the relationship. The grooming process has six different stages. 

Locating a target and vulnerabilities. Predators often have a specific ‘type.’ The abuser will begin to insert themselves into their victim’s life. They’ll pay special attention to the child and give them what they don’t get at home–attention, affection, or even a listening ear. 

Gaining trust. Predators will do what they can to gain the trust of both their victim and the child’s family. They’ll gather information about the child and use it to establish trust. 

Filling a need. Abusers will insert themselves into the child’s life even more. They’ll give gifts or take a special interest in what the child is interested in.  

Isolating the victim. The abuser will begin to isolate the victim from their friends and family. They may tell the victim things like “they don’t understand you as I do.” The abuser will reassure the child that they care for them in ways others, even the child’s parents, do not. The offender will push for more time alone with the child. 

Sexualizing the relationship. Once emotional dependence has been established, perpetrators will begin pushing the relationship into new territory. Inappropriate touching usually begins at this stage. They may ask the child how much they know about sex or if they’ve ever tried it. They may share their own sexual desires with the child.

Maintaining control. Once the predator begins to sexually abuse their victim, they will do everything possible to remain in control. The perpetrator may use threats of violence to control the child. They may threaten to hurt the victim or members of their family if the child tells.    

signs of grooming online

Child Grooming Signs: Recognizing Red Flag Behavior for Grooming Children

Being able to recognize red flag behavior can aid in protecting children from a predator. Recognizing grooming behaviors in an adult can potentially save a child’s life. Below, we’ve listed some common red flags to look for in adults who associate with your children. 

Signs of Grooming in Children

The following signs are the most common warning signs of grooming in children:

  • gifts to a young person or the child’s family
  • an unusual interest or disproportionate amount of attention to one or a few young people
  • communication through messaging apps, games, or social media without permission from caregivers
  • shares secrets or asks the younger person to share a secret with them
  • people who prefer spending time with young people over other adults
  • extreme motivation to have alone time with young people, through trips, outings, a private meeting place, or even just in another room
  • Giving drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes to teenagers

A young person can be groomed online or in person. Offenders can use the internet to get more information than they could in person. They often pretend to be friends at or around the same age.

Signs of Grooming a Teenager

Teenagers can be groomed by those older than them. These adults may say things like “you’re so mature for your age” and convince the teen to sneak out to meet them. Many teenagers are aware of online predators, but it’s almost impossible to know if someone is who they say they are. 

Signs of Child Grooming By a Parent

Signs of grooming by parents are believed to be more manipulative of the emotional connection than tactics used by non-family groomers. Survivors describe warning signs of parental grooming as giving the child excessive special privileges or gifts, isolating the child from siblings or other family members, and encouraging secrecy about activities. In many cases, this develops over weeks or years. Hugging or cuddling starts a normal interaction. Then groomers will introduce physical affection beyond what’s appropriate, like massages. If young people get upset, groomers will blame or shame the child for setting boundaries or being unhappy. They’ll continue to reinforce this and test limits in ways that create dependency and compliance. When the misuse of the natural emotional connection doesn’t work, parents may opt for intimidation, guilt, or threats to withhold love or attention, particularly for young girls.

If you are worried that this is occurring in a young person’s home, contact the local law enforcement for advice on how to move forward.

signs of child predator grooming

Signs of Child Sexual Abuse

While it’s important to keep an eye on the adults in your child’s life, it’s just as important to keep an open relationship with your child. Recognizing new behavior in your child could mean that you catch the grooming behavior before it escalates into a sexual relationship. It’s important to let your child know that they can talk to you if they feel unsafe. 

Some of the common signs of sexual abuse in children include:

  • Sudden change in behavior
  • Change in eating habits
  • Change in sleeping habits
  • Spending less time with their usual friend group
  • Secrecy about their thoughts or feelings
  • Has unexplained gifts and toys
  • Spending time with one particular adult
  • Self-harm
  • Asking sexually explicit questions to other children or other adults

What To Do If You Suspect Sexual Abuse in A Child

If you suspect a young person has been groomed or abused, report this to the police immediately. Caregivers should not try to expose a mentor, teacher, or person in a position of power, or even the person posing as a child online, on behalf of potential victims. Trying to intervene to expose a predator or groomer can result in retaliation and interpersonal violence. Police will create safe environments and gather evidence on behalf of survivors before they pursue criminal charges.

If the suspicion involves professionals targeting young people, police will often work with the school or company to minimize the risks and keep the young people safe while they prepare for arrest. This can include keeping the older person separate from the adolescents without making them suspicious that they’re involved in a criminal investigation.

If you’re concerned that a younger person was manipulated, groomed, or exploited, we understand this is distressing. You must speak to the police. They’ll work with a person who specializes in these scenarios. Once evidence is collected from school computers, from online games, from mobile phones, or wherever the acts happened, both perpetrators and the organisations they work for will be held accountable, depending on the institutional responses.

Our attorney team understands that being secretive when another adult commits such a heinous act is difficult. We’re committed to the prevention of child abuse and child protection. We know the warning signs of grooming a child, such as adults or older children possessing an unusual interest in developing a close relationship with a younger person in order to gain the child’s trust, for example. Grooming a child is a crime, but our attorneys can also hold groomers responsible for child sexual abuse and misuse of power in civil court. Holding a perpetrator and the company they work for accountable is a way to provide financial support for young people and their families. Holding professionals and online grooming perpetrators responsible civilly can provide money for therapy and the emotional consequences of being groomed or sexually abused without consent at a young age.

signs of grooming in children

How Can A Sexual Abuse Lawsuit Help?

Unlike criminal courts, civil lawsuits aren’t bogged down with the same burden of proof. A civil lawsuit can help you and your child receive compensation for the injuries they sustained from a child sexual abuser. In some cases, a civil lawsuit for victims can focus on the organization that allowed the behavior to occur. 

We have pursued sexual abuse claims, such as the following:

Children and teens who suffer from sexual abuse often have lasting damage. Sexual abuse as a child can lead to depression, PTSD, anxiety, and an increased risk of substance abuse. The healing process often involves expensive therapy that lasts for many years. A sexual abuse lawsuit can help you recover compensation for your child’s injuries and trauma.

For a free and confidential consultation, call our Texas child sexual abuse attorneys at (713) 622-7271.

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